Washing machine, pinstripe dream |
| Stripped the gloss from a beauty queen |
| Found our nest, in the Daily Express |
| Met the vicar in a holy vest |
Brought up the children Church of E |
| Now I vegetate with a colour TV |
| Worst ever thing that ever happened to me |
| Oh, for D.I.V.O.R.C.E., oh Judy |
Whatever happened to pillow fights |
| Whatever happened to jeans so tight, Friday nights |
| Whatever happened to lover's lane |
| Whatever happened to passion games |
| Sunday walks in the pouring rain |
Curling tongs, mogadons |
| I got a headache baby, don't take so long |
| Single beds, middle age dread |
| Losing the war in the Waistlands spread |
Who left the cap of the toothpaste tube |
| Who forgot to flush the loo |
| Leave your sweaty socks outside the door |
| Don't walk across my polished floor, oh Judy |
Whatever happened to morning smiles |
| Whatever happened to wicked wiles, permissive styles |
| Whatever happened to twinkling eyes, hard fast drives |
| Complements on unnatural size |
Propping up a bar, family car |
| Sweating out a mortgage as a balding clerk |
| World war three, suburbanshee |
| Just slip her these pills and I'll be free |
No more Judy, Judy, Judy no more |
| Goodbye Judy |